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Colmes is running for politics!


parentofredheads

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That's right, folks, you heard it here FIRST!

 

Colmes' platform:

 

HIS PLATFORM:

 

(1) 'Press 1 for English' is immediately banned.. English is the official language; speak it or wait at the border until you can.

 

(2) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports, no exports. We will use the policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.'

 

(3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.

 

(4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our many observation towers on the southern border (six month tour). They will be under strict orders not to fire on SOUTHBOUNDaliens.

 

(5) Social security will immediately return to its original state. If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't getting nuttin out. The president nor any other politician will be able to touch it.

 

(6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the 40 hour school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a passing grade. You have two years to graduate. Should you fail any grade, you will lose your welfare automatically. Should you require food stamps, you will be required to run all hot food shelters for the homeless, pick up trash along every roadside in America, work at all county, city, and state jobs, and be a helper at a daycare facility. All must work a minimum of 40 hours. If you miss a day of work, you lose your food stamps, welfare, etc. If you are unable, physically to work, if you can talk, we've got the job for you. If your fingers move, we've got the job for you. If your legs work, we've got the job for you.

 

(7) Professional Athletes--Steroids. The FIRST time you check positive you're banned for life, and must pass a simple math and spelling test before signing.

 

(8) Crime - If convicted of murder, you will be put to death by the same method you chose for your victim; gun, knife, strangulation, etc.

 

(9) One export will be allowed, Wheat. The world needs to eat. A bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.

 

(10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and ultimately lower taxes.. When disasters occur around the world, we'll ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.

 

(11) The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school and every day in Congress.

 

(12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc.

 

(13) Barney Frank, Nancy Pelosi, Snowbama, etc. will all be tried before the American people as criminals. The jury will be the American people.

 

(14) On polling days, every single American will MUST VOTE. All employers will be instructed if they don't show their punch card that they've voted, they MAY NOT RETURN TO WORK UNTIL THEY DO.

 

(15) Unions are outlawed

 

(16) Any business who can't run their own business, can go through proper channels of bankruptcy, just like the rest of the American people do. If your Harvard education doesn't help you run a company, maybe you should talk to individual citizens that know how to stay within a household budget.

 

(17) The budget of the United States will always be in the black, and plenty of it.

 

(18) Oil drilling will be opened across the United States, and in our waters. Any state refusing, will not be given their "share" from the U.S. government.

 

(19) Nuclear, wind, and solar plants will commence immediately. Any state refusing same, will not be given their "share" from the U.S. Government.

 

(20) Congress' healthcare will NOT be paid by the taxpayers. Congress' pay will be a straight fee of $45,000 per year. This job is only for the true American, not for someone wanting to make a name for themselves, nor fill their wallets! Once voted out, they receive no more compensation from the American taxpayers, nor any other taxpayer compensation for ANYTHING! They will no longer receive any funds whatsoever, except to run for re-election, and can only come from private citizens, of nothing more than $500. No funds whatsoever!

 

(21) Congress must work for a full year, with ONLY 2 weeks vacation.

 

(22) The Supreme Court will work for a full year, with only 2 weeks vacation. Beginning at 8:00 a.m. every morning, and finishing at 5:00 p.m. every day. No start-ups of 10:00 a.m.

 

(23) Any person running for the President of the United States must PROVE he is an American citizen, and reveal EVERYTHING about his past life to the American public, so they can make an informed decision.

 

(24) All three branches of the U.S. Government will no longer ride in expensive planes, except for the President of the United States. There will be no more outings, no more family gatherings, except only in the White House and at Camp David for two weeks out of the year. If they wish to go somewhere, they may pay and fly a public plane, just like the rest of America.

 

 

VOTE FOR COLMES!

 

Mr. Colmes needs your vote this upcoming election, and if you'd like to add more to Mr. Colmes' platform, feel free to do so.

 

DISCLAIMER: This is a joke, in case you didn't know it.

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That's a lot of rules you are pushing on me. Do you have a gun to my head as well?

 

Okay, bad attempt at sarcasm.

 

I can live with most of the rules listed with the exception of the following numbers:

PS - this is not directed at any one person, just putting thoughts on paper

1. Let's not forget our ancestors came over here on a boat (unless you are American Indian), and there were quite a few that didn't speak English.

4. Retired military personnel are just that - retired. If you want them to do six more months, sign them up for the reserves or use the last six months of their duty.

6. I don't like the welfare system, but you have explained a job. I'm sure they'd like to get paid in cash for working a 40 hour week.

7. Politicians have no business in professional sports. Let the leaders of the sport make those decisions. How many MLB games have you been to lately, and do you really care if the athletes are juicing?

8. Don't really have a problem with this one, just don't talk about Jesus out one side of your mouth and talk about killing out of the other. I know, an eye for an eye. Really? WWJD?

10. Just reminds me of the hipocrisy of Christianity in our country.

11. You mean it's not?

20. I must not be a true American by these standards. There is no way I would take that job for $45,000 a year.

22. Good luck keeping those seats filled.

23. LOL!

24. Without any perks, why would someone want to take the huge paycut and be President. If we currently had a President we liked and believed in, this wouldn't even be an issue.

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4. Retired military personnel are just that - retired. If you want them to do six more months, sign them up for the reserves or use the last six months of their duty.

 

I agree. Plank 4 is a very disgusting view of the men and women that dedicated their lives to serving the country. Any thought of conscripting military retirees is patently un-American.

 

I would never vote for someone that endorses plank 4. Or 2, 3, 6, 7, 9, 14, 20, 21, 22, 24.

 

No dictator for me.

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IF I were running, THAT would be my platform......parentoffredheads has been paying attention...... :thumbsup:

LOL! You know that e-mail that goes around, well, I got it again yesterday... First thing that popped into my head... your platform! Then when I put it on there, I thought, no, if it's Colmes, gotta add some more to it! LOL!

 

P.S.: I did take out the deal about crime - we're like Turkey now; if you steal, you lose your hand...didn't figure that would go over well with the American public... LOL!

 

So there's your platform. Ready?

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I agree. Plank 4 is a very disgusting view of the men and women that dedicated their lives to serving the country. Any thought of conscripting military retirees is patently un-American.

 

I would never vote for someone that endorses plank 4. Or 2, 3, 6, 7, 9, 14, 20, 21, 22, 24.

 

No dictator for me.

 

I concur. Use of all of these would make us a third world country, complete with swollen bellied tots with dirt and flies on their faces.

 

My least favorite is 8. I believe in the God given right identified in the Bill of Rights not to suffer cruel and unusual punishment. Kill killers, sure. But do it to get rid of a problem, not to get your jollies.

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I myself am not a fan of 4.

 

I agree with most of the others, but 4 stands out as the one that I don't agree with.

 

I'll stand behind an honest soldier 200%, and I appreciate all that they do for their country, especially since it is a FULLY VOLUNTEER job. And I believe once they do that job then, that it is, they have done their duty and we should do nothing more than thank them, not REQUIRE them to work for another 6 months.

 

Now, I do realize that the whole premise of this thread is completely hypothetical (the policies, not that Colmes couldn't/shouldn't make an attempt to run for office should he gain the support of his community and district). :thumbsup:

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One thing that makes the US so unique is that we have never had soldiers walking our streets, except when the guard or reserves are called out--and that is usually by the state's governor after some natural disaster. We rely basiclly on our local police. Now there is the argument whether that is enough-- and always will be an arguement. But if you have visited another country and have seen armed patrols, I dont think America is ready for that.

Say what you want and hammer me all you want, but illegals came here because the work was here. We should have a visitor program, where thay are sent back every so often and families are not allowed. This point may be moot in this economy as work has slowed, Americans are willing to do labor and are hungry. The immigrants helped during the boom of the 90's and early 2000's. We durn sure dont teach our kids to that sort of work in schools--the kids think thay are too good and want too much money for an entry level job. Even though I started at the end of the shovel, I didnt stay there, that lesson is lost on our young ones.

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I myself am not a fan of 4.

 

I agree with most of the others, but 4 stands out as the one that I don't agree with.

 

I'll stand behind an honest soldier 200%, and I appreciate all that they do for their country, especially since it is a FULLY VOLUNTEER job. And I believe once they do that job then, that it is, they have done their duty and we should do nothing more than thank them, not REQUIRE them to work for another 6 months.

 

Now, I do realize that the whole premise of this thread is completely hypothetical (the policies, not that Colmes couldn't/shouldn't make an attempt to run for office should he gain the support of his community and district). :thumbsup:

I'm with you there. #4 seems to be confusing people. I think some are reading in too much on #4.

 

Once they come out, they come back for 6 more months of duty to man our borders, that's it, that's all. Of course, they'll be paid, etc. Of all the "government" employees there are... the military men and women get a slap in the face. They should be afforded MORE benefits than any other "government" employee, and their healthcare should be better than our own.

 

The whole premise of #4 is, you have your active military overseas, wherever. Then you have the ones finishing their tour at home defending our borders.

 

 

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Say what you want and hammer me all you want, but illegals came here because the work was here. We should have a visitor program, where thay are sent back every so often and families are not allowed. This point may be moot in this economy as work has slowed, Americans are willing to do labor and are hungry. The immigrants helped during the boom of the 90's and early 2000's. We durn sure dont teach our kids to that sort of work in schools--the kids think thay are too good and want too much money for an entry level job. Even though I started at the end of the shovel, I didnt stay there, that lesson is lost on our young ones.

Great post... we appreciated the illegals doing the jobs we did not want to do when the economy was booming. Now when work has slowed we want them to get the heck out. Guess what... while they were here they had children. These children are American citizens because they were born in the United States. In essence, we created our own problems when it comes to the illegals from the South.

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Dirty jobs used to have "dorms" for them to live in, when the work was gone they went back home. Libs who saw voters and probally others who exploited illegals said, stay here and work and bring your family. Yes, it is our fault. did we boycott those restaurants, that home builder, that yard service? Nope. did we call the migra? Nope, because we were fat and happy, and now that the economy is sour, they are the scapegoats.
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I'm also at a loss on 14 as well......I understand what you are saying, but why?

 

Was this great country not founded on the freedoms by which we all are exercising??

 

Especially a freedom here on this very thread.......opinions have been voiced......not all agree. And that's okay because we are not forced to agree with each other.

 

Now, I'm as conservative as most of you (I think), but how are we to get people to the Republican party or even bring them back to the conservative way of thinking if we badger them and belittle them into thinking they are worthless and completely wrong?? (Okay, I'm not gonna lie, that was hard for me to write, because I don't agree with liberals........and I do think they're darn near completely wrong).

 

As American citizens we are afforded the freedom of religion, speech, the RIGHT to vote.

 

Would you REALLY want to force someone to vote if they had no true knowledge of a candidate?? I sure as hell don't.

 

Just look at our current president......I mean, really, lets face it a lot of his votes were from the African American community as well as a handful of the minority community (Mexican, Japanese, etc., etc.) and it was JUST BECAUSE he is black. I don't know about you, but I don't want another elected official in office unless he's given a truly educated vote. People just voted because he was a "brother." I've heard more than one person say that.

 

For those people who voted for president Obama with the full knowledge (as much "knowledge" as you can get from him anyway....) and education about what he "promised" he was going to do, then I have respect for them, because they exercised their right to vote and they did so in an educated manor. I may not respect their DECISION or CHOICE for president, but I respect them for standing up and voting and doing so with an educated voice.

 

And by that same token, for those people who voted for or even against Obama just because he's black.....I have no respect for PERIOD. His color has nothing to do with what he can or can not do. I may not agree with certain aspects of any one given culture but that doesn't mean that I should look at him based solely on the actions of others in his culture.

 

I just flat don't like Obama or his dictatorship ways. PERIOD.

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I'm also at a loss on 14 as well......I understand what you are saying, but why?

 

Was this great country not founded on the freedoms by which we all are exercising??

 

Especially a freedom here on this very thread.......opinions have been voiced......not all agree. And that's okay because we are not forced to agree with each other.

 

Now, I'm as conservative as most of you (I think), but how are we to get people to the Republican party or even bring them back to the conservative way of thinking if we badger them and belittle them into thinking they are worthless and completely wrong?? (Okay, I'm not gonna lie, that was hard for me to write, because I don't agree with liberals........and I do think they're darn near completely wrong).

 

As American citizens we are afforded the freedom of religion, speech, the RIGHT to vote.

 

Would you REALLY want to force someone to vote if they had no true knowledge of a candidate?? I sure as hell don't.

 

Just look at our current president......I mean, really, lets face it a lot of his votes were from the African American community as well as a handful of the minority community (Mexican, Japanese, etc., etc.) and it was JUST BECAUSE he is black. I don't know about you, but I don't want another elected official in office unless he's given a truly educated vote. People just voted because he was a "brother." I've heard more than one person say that.

 

For those people who voted for president Obama with the full knowledge (as much "knowledge" as you can get from him anyway....) and education about what he "promised" he was going to do, then I have respect for them, because they exercised their right to vote and they did so in an educated manor. I may not respect their DECISION or CHOICE for president, but I respect them for standing up and voting and doing so with an educated voice.

 

And by that same token, for those people who voted for or even against Obama just because he's black.....I have no respect for PERIOD. His color has nothing to do with what he can or can not do. I may not agree with certain aspects of any one given culture but that doesn't mean that I should look at him based solely on the actions of others in his culture.

 

I just flat don't like Obama or his dictatorship ways. PERIOD.

 

All very valid points and I totally agree with you. There's been an e-mail passed around, oh, for a year or so now, and I got it again the other day. As soon as I saw it, I thought, oh, SNAP, that could be Colmes' platform for running, and then I took out some things, added some things, just based on what I "perceived" as Colmes' platform. What's funny is... the whole thing was a joke. That's why I came back on and put at the bottom... DISCLAIMER... THIS IS A JOKE...

 

But then it sorta took a life of its own, wouldn't you agree...LOL! What has been very eye-opening, is noticing the difference of true conservatism all the way to slap in the middle, and some even leaning to the left. What I perceive as exactly what's wrong with the conservative/republican feelings/opinions/platform... and why the conservatives can't seem to get it together - not that everybody's going to have the same opinion on every issue. Exactly why I wasn't real tickeled to have McCain as representing the "conserative" or "republican" base...lesser of two evils in my mind.

 

So for #14, what I had in mind was (as I was making all this up!) was, first you have to assume the following:

 

1) That every voting-age American has a job.

2) Statistics show that those who have jobs are more informed.

3) Statistics show those who are informed, do vote.

4) And, jeesh, if Colmes was actually running for office, I'm sure he'd mandate a deal where employees GOT PAID FROM THEIR EMPLOYER that day, in order to go vote...LOL!... instead of citizens having to rush before/during lunch/or after work to go vote, or not finding the time to do so.

 

Fact:

 

Thousands upon thousands of American people, young, old, men, women, and even children have given their lives so that we have the RIGHT to vote. Shouldn't we honor their lives/death in actually getting off our arses and expressing one of the most important rights they have given us? I suggest to you, had people actually been voting, a lot of the mess we've seen in the last whatever years... wouldn't have happened.

 

Therein lies the reasoning behind #14. Not to mention...I'm not sure, but I don't think there's a big voting percentage of American citizens in the U.S. There are a lot of mandates that we have no choice about. We've lost our freedoms, and are losing more freedoms. Truthfully, I think when the founding fathers wrote the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution of the United States, they actually perceived everyone, who could, would vote.

 

 

 

 

 

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4) And, jeesh, if Colmes was actually running for office, I'm sure he'd mandate a deal where employees GOT PAID FROM THEIR EMPLOYER that day, in order to go vote...LOL!... instead of citizens having to rush before/during lunch/or after work to go vote, or not finding the time to do so.

 

Therein lies the reasoning behind #14. Not to mention...I'm not sure, but I don't think there's a big voting percentage of American citizens in the U.S. There are a lot of mandates that we have no choice about. We've lost our freedoms, and are losing more freedoms. Truthfully, I think when the founding fathers wrote the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution of the United States, they actually perceived everyone, who could, would vote.

 

Nice... another government mandate on businesses. Not a conservative ideal at all.

 

The Framers were all about freedom. Had they "actually perceived everyone, who could, would vote", we would be able to find it written in the Constitution. They understood wholly that freedom includes not voting.

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All very valid points and I totally agree with you. There's been an e-mail passed around, oh, for a year or so now, and I got it again the other day. As soon as I saw it, I thought, oh, SNAP, that could be Colmes' platform for running, and then I took out some things, added some things, just based on what I "perceived" as Colmes' platform. What's funny is... the whole thing was a joke. That's why I came back on and put at the bottom... DISCLAIMER... THIS IS A JOKE...

 

But then it sorta took a life of its own, wouldn't you agree...LOL! What has been very eye-opening, is noticing the difference of true conservatism all the way to slap in the middle, and some even leaning to the left. What I perceive as exactly what's wrong with the conservative/republican feelings/opinions/platform... and why the conservatives can't seem to get it together - not that everybody's going to have the same opinion on every issue. Exactly why I wasn't real tickeled to have McCain as representing the "conserative" or "republican" base...lesser of two evils in my mind.

 

So for #14, what I had in mind was (as I was making all this up!) was, first you have to assume the following:

 

1) That every voting-age American has a job.

2) Statistics show that those who have jobs are more informed.

3) Statistics show those who are informed, do vote.

4) And, jeesh, if Colmes was actually running for office, I'm sure he'd mandate a deal where employees GOT PAID FROM THEIR EMPLOYER that day, in order to go vote...LOL!... instead of citizens having to rush before/during lunch/or after work to go vote, or not finding the time to do so.

 

Fact:

 

Thousands upon thousands of American people, young, old, men, women, and even children have given their lives so that we have the RIGHT to vote. Shouldn't we honor their lives/death in actually getting off our arses and expressing one of the most important rights they have given us? I suggest to you, had people actually been voting, a lot of the mess we've seen in the last whatever years... wouldn't have happened.

 

Therein lies the reasoning behind #14. Not to mention...I'm not sure, but I don't think there's a big voting percentage of American citizens in the U.S. There are a lot of mandates that we have no choice about. We've lost our freedoms, and are losing more freedoms. Truthfully, I think when the founding fathers wrote the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution of the United States, they actually perceived everyone, who could, would vote.

 

Yes, it has definitely taken a life of it's own, you're correct there.

 

But, how have we shown any stance other than being conservative?

 

I'm really not trying to incite an argument here, I just don't see how (in this thread) those of us that have given our opinions have strayed away from conservatism, in any way...:blink:

 

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So it's a "joke" where people began to post the points they liked or didn't like. Isn't that called "conversation" and having the freedom of speech to voice an opinion? I've discovered that's what happens on most topics that are started.

 

POR posts: "What has been very eye-opening, is noticing the difference of true conservatism all the way to slap in the middle, and some even leaning to the left."

 

Just who are you talking about? What exactly are your definitions of these three differences and please give examples of each.

 

POR posts: "So for #14, what I had in mind was (as I was making all this up!) was, first you have to assume the following:

 

1) That every voting-age American has a job."

 

Wow, that kinda leaves out stay-at-home moms, those who are disabled and unable to work, retired individuals, students, etc.

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Yes, it has definitely taken a life of it's own, you're correct there.

 

But, how have we shown any stance other than being conservative?

 

I'm really not trying to incite an argument here, I just don't see how (in this thread) those of us that have given our opinions have strayed away from conservatism, in any way...:blink:

Some people have varying degrees of being conservative. For example, had Colmes truly believed in the original post, then that's his idea of conservatism. Then you have posters who disagreed with "Colmes platform", and why they don't like again, "Colmes platform."

 

Here's a prime example, and on this, and you're very right. For example, I'm sure most of us know people who are conservatives, vote conservative or Republican, but believe in abortion, to a point (and I reiterate that to a point there). Some of us know conservatives who are also gay. And I'm assuming the same with democrats and liberals... all and in between... why we have Blue Dogs, so to speak. Many examples there. You have democrats who don't believe in abortion or gay rights, etc.

 

Another example... McCain. Was he a conservative? In some ways, but in a lot of others, no. So what do you call him? A real conservative, middle of the road conservative, or straddling the 50% line between conserative and liberal. Same with other folks, what do you call 'em, conservative, middle conservative, or 50%...

 

I may be radically conservative on one point, in the middle on another point, and 50% on something else. What's even more interesting is the things they wanted to take away or change... but didn't ADD to the platform; i.e., gun rights, for example, and many more topics that aren't even addressed, etc.

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What's even more interesting is the things they wanted to take away or change... but didn't ADD to the platform; i.e., gun rights, for example, and many more topics that aren't even addressed, etc.

 

As an English teacher, I always have my students give me a clear antecedent. Who are you referring to when you write "they"?

 

You are vague; be specific. What topics?

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25: ALL files on UFO's, aliens, the kennedy assassination, etc. will be declassified and released to the general public post haste.....Area 51 will begin public tours ASAP......We will begin plans to put a man on Mars by the middle of this century....We will begin colonization of the Moon in the next decade......

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