rock95 Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 The best one I heard was "You play worse and worse every day, and right now it looks like you're in the middle of next month" Lol I like that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stankylegg Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 Coach to a middle school linebacker - "You plannin of hittin anybody today?" Player - "Coach, I've hit somebody every play" Coach - "Your own teamates don't count son" Player - "I thought I was supposed to be blocking" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stankylegg Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 Coach Toon "Oh GOSH!! that locker room smells like the south end of a northbound mule. I know half of yall haven't hit puberty yet and are embarrassed about what ya don't have, but yall gotta start taking a dad gomn shower before you go back in that school. I'm guna start gettin emails from teachers, and you (Insert kids name), you need to start brushin our teeth. Your breath is kickin like Bruce Lee. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dimmtim Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 ? REally lol! Â never one to side with lion70, but that is the exact word that popped in my head. i only wish my coaches had said something that nice to me and he is on the school board now! lololol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CoachC44 Posted September 14, 2011 Share Posted September 14, 2011 We were in the weight room one time and a kid came up to the coach and said "Coach my finger hurts" Coach "Go to the trainer and ask him for some Vagasil cream to rub on it" Needless to say the next day the trainer came to the coach and said "I had a kid come up to me asking for some Vagasil for his finger and I couldn't stop myself from laughing" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coachc45 Posted September 14, 2011 Share Posted September 14, 2011 We were in the weight room one time and a kid came up to the coach and said "Coach my finger hurts" Coach "Go to the trainer and ask him for some Vagasil cream to rub on it" Needless to say the next day the trainer came to the coach and said "I had a kid come up to me asking for some Vagasil for his finger and I couldn't stop myself from laughing" Â That is funny stuff right there!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reddog92 Posted September 14, 2011 Share Posted September 14, 2011 Player: Coach I tried! Coach: I know son its called genetics   Good One Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigDave Posted September 14, 2011 Share Posted September 14, 2011 That is funny stuff right there!!! Â Â I choked on my sweet tea when I read that one! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueBlazes Posted September 14, 2011 Share Posted September 14, 2011 We were in the weight room one time and a kid came up to the coach and said "Coach my finger hurts" Coach "Go to the trainer and ask him for some Vagasil cream to rub on it" Needless to say the next day the trainer came to the coach and said "I had a kid come up to me asking for some Vagasil for his finger and I couldn't stop myself from laughing" Â Â :D I don't care who you are, that's just plain funny!!! :lol: :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldandwhite Posted September 14, 2011 Share Posted September 14, 2011 I was once coaching a freshman kid whose legs were hurting. He went to the trainer and the trainer said " son, do you have shin splints?" The kid said " Naw Coach but I can git me some at Wal-Mart this weekend" LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueBlazes Posted September 14, 2011 Share Posted September 14, 2011 Because he was too small to play any other position, my best friends little brother decided he wanted to be a kicker/punter. He was doing really well after several weeks of practicing kickoffs, so the coach decided it was time to try punting. Coach showed him what to do 5 or 6 times & talked to him a good bit, then asked him if he had any questions. He looked around & said, "Can't I use the tee?" Coach asked, "What tee?" Looking puzzled he answered, "The punting tee, Coach!" Coach rubbed his eyes & chuckled, "Well son, if you can find it, I reckon you can use it." With that the kid trotted off the field, & spent the rest of practice searching the equipment room for the ever elusive, punting tee!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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